From Promise to Pilgrimage: A Journey of Love and Heart

From Promise to Pilgrimage:

A Journey of Love and Heart

Mum, this is a story of a promise made, a vow honoured,

a pledge fulfilled, and a profound journey to

your final resting place alongside my beloved Dad

My Precious Mum & Dad

Ma, your heart remained tethered to our homeland in Qingdao, China, despite lived with us in the UK for those 16 wonderful years, as the separation from your roots, your family, your friends, and the familiarity of your birthplace, weighed heavily on your mind, because it had been 7 long years since your last visit, the ache for returning only intensified with time, and your yearning for home became even more profound during the damn pandemic, I made a heartfelt promise to you “Ma, once this COVID have relinquished its grip on the world, I will take you back, visit everyone”, unaware that fate had a different course planned for us

Ma, life’s twists and turns often lead us down paths we never imagined, the commitment to embark on that journey together, you had so eagerly anticipated for years, was one forged in love, a vow intended to bring you joy and a sense of belonging, and letting your beautiful soul bask in the comfort of home once again, however, destiny dealt me with the worst and the most unexpected hand, and your sudden and untimely passing shattered the future we had envisioned, left behind a longing unaddressed, and the possibility of fulfilling that wish while you were alive, as a promise carried unseen weight, resonate long after it made

Ma, as I grappled with this overwhelming loss, the unbelievable initial shock and disbelief, and the immeasurable heartache, navigating this newfound brutal reality, that I realised the magnitude of my commitment, little did I know, that promise I made was to enable you the chance to relive cherished memories, a pledge fuelled by your nostalgia for the land where your unique story began, spent the most vibrant years of your remarkable life, transformed into something deeper, life-altering, and beyond my imagination, yet, amid my grief and my sorrow, arose a solemn determination to honour your wishes in a way I never foreseen

Ma, my recent journey back home was not the joyous visit what we had planned, but it was a poignant journey of fulfilling my vow to you nonetheless, an ode to the promise I made to a different kind, that evolved beyond its original form yet held true to its essence, a voyage spanned thousands of miles and across continents, a passage laden with untold emotions, and a pilgrimage of the heart of love, from West, where you resided, to East, the very land that held your heart captive, once your playground where you laughed, thrived, and lived a life singularly your own, and this sacred quest, overloaded with the echoes of a lifetime

Ma, the enormity of this undertaking, undoubtedly the most arduous odyssey of my whole life, hit me so damn hard as I carrying your essence of your soul across oceans and skies, traversing the depths of loss and the heights of reverence, each moment bore the imprints of treasured memories, each mile retraced the footsteps of a life so well-lived, each bloody step reminded me of your dreadful absence, as the physical distance seemed insignificant compared to the gravity of the journey settled within, that felt like the heaviest burden and the deepest calling simultaneously, it was daunting, but the purpose was crystal clear

Ma, arriving in the land you held dear, the place you once called home, and now welcomed you back in a different contour, that altered by circumstances and redefined by fate, it was a surreal blend of familiarity and strangeness, a convergence of past and present, as it felt like stepping into a living memoir and turning the pages of a prized novel, and revisiting the streets you once walked, the sights you adored, and the people you loved, every corner of this ancestral city held a piece of your history, where you story reached its poignant finale, a reunion with my beloved dad, your spirits merged once again in an eternal embrace

Ma, this journey, the hardest I ever made in my whole damn life, what began as a promise became a soulful trek to honour the legacy of two extraordinary lives that shaped mine, as the heaviest part of the journey was both a heartbreaking and profoundly beautiful moment to lay you to rest with dad side by side, once more, beneath the skies you once shared, to witness your final resting place together, amidst the tranquility of your birth soil, where your love story found ultimate closure, in the end, it was a return to your origins, a homecoming of your heart, and a union of the unbreakable bond, forever etched in your motherland