The day we suddenly lost my darling Mum

happiness left too, as if in that single, tragic

moment she took all the joy and light with her

as if something that belongs to another life

a life had been ended from that point forward

the colours of the world faded, the bliss that

once so intertwined with my days vanished

Before, happiness was simply being together

it was something that flowed naturally and

effortlessly in our lives, but now, without her

the simplest of emotions, have been replaced

with the sharp ache of loss, the deepest sorrow

as if with her unexpected passing, I have lost

my right and my ability to feel true happiness

In my grief, happiness becomes distant, elusive

like a foreign concept I can no longer grasp

I have searched for it in the places it used to be

the beauty of nature, the comfort of routines

but no matter where I look, it feels out of reach

everything I once knew and cherished has been

overshadowed by her excruciating absence

Happiness feels impossible, because what I really

long for is something I can never have again

I yearn for her presence, her voice, and her love

but the truth is, I do not want to leave her behind

I am not ready to embrace happiness without her

I push it away, so I can hold on to her a little longer

that happiness, as I knew it, may be gone forever